Restricting your financial freedom the cycle of financial abuse is surely not easy to deal with. Break the chains of this abuse through this powerful read.

In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month, this October I want to shine a light on financial abuse in this blog.

Financial abuse, also known as economic abuse, is a type of domestic violence where the abuser uses money as a means of controlling their partner. It can take many forms, such as withholding access to money, controlling how money is spent, or preventing the victim from working or having their own bank account. Not only does it involve outright theft of funds or credit, but it may also include the subtle manipulation of financial resources to restrict the victim’s freedom.

This is vehemently depicted in the Netflix series titled ‘Maid’ where the protagonist Alex suffers financial abuse from her ex-partner Sean. Controlling her right to communication with others by cutting off her phone and means to travel, the series depicts the reality of how financial abuse survivors continue to suffer from the aftermath of their abuse. 

The tactics of financial abuse are varied and can also include ruining the victim’s credit score, hiding assets, and generating debt in the victim’s name. Abusers might also manipulate or coerce victims into signing financial documents or making financial decisions that are detrimental to their interests.

Financial abuse can occur in any type of relationship, including marriages, partnerships, and even between family members. It is a form of power and control, and it can have serious consequences for the victim’s financial stability and overall well-being. The impact of financial abuse extends beyond the immediate loss of funds; it can lead to long-term financial insecurity and can significantly hinder the victim’s ability to recover even after the abusive relationship has ended.

How Does Financial Abuse Affect Women?

Financial abuse can have severe consequences for women, both in the short and long term.They may internalize and attach their identity to feeling trapped, isolated, and dependent on their abuser. Here are some ways in which financial abuse can affect women:

Limited Access to Basic Needs

By limiting acces to basic needs like food, shelter and clothing the abuser may use such tactics as means of control over the victim. As the abuser holds power over the money voluntarily or involuntarily in the household, they exploit this power imbalance over their victim.  This can leave the victim in a vulnerable and dangerous situation. It can also impact the well-being of any children in the household, perpetuating the cycle of abuse across generations.

In extreme cases, financial abuse can escalate to economic exploitation, where the victim is coerced into illegal activities such as fraud or theft on behalf of the abuser. Such actions can lead to legal consequences for the victim, further entangling them in the abusive dynamic and making it harder to seek assistance.

Limited Employment Opportunities

Financial abuse can also limit a woman’s employment opportunities. The abuser might stop them from earning a living or damage their employment by controlling their means of getting around or making it hard for them to go to work. This can result in a lack of financial freedom and restrict the victim’s capacity to escape the abusive partnership. In some cases, abusers may also harass the victim at their workplace, which can result in job loss or tarnished professional relationships.

The consequences of lost employment extend beyond immediate income. It affects the victim’s career trajectory, professional development, and retirement savings. The loss of networking opportunities and the erosion of work skills can make re-entering the workforce challenging, even after escaping the abusive situation.

Negative Impact on Mental Health

The constant control and manipulation of finances can have a significant impact on a woman’s mental health. The victim may also feel like they have no control over their life, leading to a sense of hopelessness and helplessness. The stress and anxiety associated with financial insecurity can contribute to physical health problems as well, creating a compounding effect on the victim’s overall health.

Victims of financial abuse often experience social isolation, as the abuser may restrict their interactions with friends and family. This isolation can exacerbate feelings of loneliness and despair, making it more difficult for victims to reach out for support or escape the situation. The shame and stigma associated with financial abuse may also prevent victims from disclosing their experiences, further entrenching the cycle of abuse.

Difficulty Leaving the Abusive Relationship

Financial abuse is often used as a tactic to keep the victim in the abusive relationship. This can make it challenging for the victim to leave and can trap them in the cycle of abuse. Without access to financial resources, victims may feel that they have nowhere to go and no means to support themselves independently.

The fear of financial ruin is a potent tool in the hands of an abuser. Victims may be concerned about the ability to afford legal representation, housing, or childcare on their own. They may also fear the societal judgment that can come with financial failure, especially if the abuser has cultivated an image of wealth and success in the public eye. All of these factors can contribute to a victim’s sense of entrapment, making it difficult to envision a life beyond the abusive relationship.

How To Deal With Financial Abuse?

If you are a victim of financial abuse, know that you are not alone and that there is help available. Here are some steps you can take to deal with financial abuse:

Recognize the Signs

The first step in dealing with financial abuse is to recognize the signs. Some red flags behaviors to notice financial abuse are:

• Your spouse has complete control over the family’s finances, leaving you unable to access any.
• Your spouse makes all the money-related choices without seeking your input.
• Your partner erratically controls money matters about you. 
• Your partner prevents you from working or sabotages your job.
• Your partner constantly checks your bank statements or credit card statements.
• Your partner forces you to sign financial documents or takes out loans in your name without your consent.

Recognizing these signs is critical, as financial abuse often occurs in conjunction with other forms of abuse, both physical and emotional. It is important to understand that financial abuse is not about money mismanagement or disagreements over spending; it is a deliberate pattern of control that can escalate over time.

Seek Support

Talking to someone you trust about your situation can be the first step towards getting help. They can be a friend, a relative or a trained therapist who can provide emotional support in trying times. 

Additionally, you can contact groups focused on domestic violence and financial exploitation for assistance. Providing you with information on leaving the relationship safely and connecting you with other services such as legal aid, housing assistance, and financial counseling. These organizations understand the complexities of financial abuse and can offer confidential assistance tailored to your specific situation.

Secure Your Finances

If you at any point feel threatened or at risk about your financial well-being in your relationship, it’s crucial to act swiftly to protect your money. This may involve: 

• Establishing a savings account solely in your possession.
• Making copies of important financial documents such as tax returns, bank statements, and insurance policies.
• Establishing a financial plan and setting aside funds for unforeseen situations.
• Changing your PINs and passwords for online banking and credit cards.

Taking control of your finances can be empowering and is a practical step towards independence. It is also important to educate yourself on financial matters, including understanding your rights and the financial laws in your jurisdiction. Knowledge is power, and being informed can help protect you from further abuse.

Create a Safety Plan

Sometimes, one may believe leaving an abusive relationship can often feel like the least favorable option caused by doubts about retaliation from the abuser. However, having a safety plan in place is a must. This plan should include:

• A safe place to go in case of an emergency, such as a friend or family member’s house.
• Important phone numbers, including the police, domestic violence hotlines, and support organizations.
• A plan for how to leave the house safely if you need to.
• A bag packed with essential items such as identification, money, and medication.

A carefully planned safety strategy can be the key to deciding whether to remain in an abusive environment or to successfully leave and begin a fresh chapter. The plan should be comprehensive, taking into account all possible scenarios and including steps to maintain your safety after you have left the relationship.

Seek Legal Help

If you are married or in a common-law relationship, you may be entitled to financial support from your partner even after you leave the relationship. Seek legal advice from a lawyer who specializes in domestic violence to understand your rights and options. A lawyer can help you navigate the legal system, which can be daunting, and advocate on your behalf for a fair settlement.

Obtaining a restraining order or protection order against your abuser, may offer some level of safety as you reclaim your financial situation. Keep in mind that legal processes can be lengthy and complex, so it’s important to have a support system in place throughout this period.

Prevention Is Key

The best way to deal with financial abuse is to prevent it from happening in the first place. Here are some tips to help prevent financial abuse:

Have Your Own Bank Account

Having a bank account in your name only gives you financial independence and a sense of control over your money. It also ensures that you have access to funds in case of an emergency. It can serve as a private reserve that your partner is unaware of, providing a level of security and autonomy.

Keep Your Financial Documents Safe

Make sure to keep your financial documents, such as bank statements, tax returns, and insurance policies, in a safe place.  Consider using a safety deposit box or trusted family member’s home to store these documents.

Maintain Financial Independence

Having your own way to earn money can provide you with financial freedom and simplify the process of ending a harmful relationship if needed. If you are not currently working, consider getting a job or taking classes to improve your skills and job prospects. Staying informed about your financial situation, including assets, debts, and credit score, can also help maintain your independence.

Financial exploitation in relationships is a significant problem impacting numerous women. It can have serious repercussions on their own financial security and autonomy. If you are a victim of financial abuse, know that you are not alone, and there is help available.You hold immense power even if someone tries to jeopardize your natural right to abundance and well-being. Dealing with abuse is never easy, but you can surely overcome it. 

Remember, prevention is key, so take steps to protect yourself and your finances. 

Helpful Resources and Links for those facing Financial Abuse:

1. National Commission for women
2. Response net 
3. Action Aid 
4. Aks Foundation 
5. Ministry of Women and Child development 

Global:

1. Domestic Abuse helpline UK
2. The National Endowment for Financial Education (NEFE) 
3. National Domestic Violence Hotline USA
4. Hong Kong Federation of Women’s Centres
5. Women’s refuge New Zealand 

Everything from short actionable tips to insightful long-form content, personally put together by me to break your negative money patterns and master your finances. 🦸🏻‍♀️

Partha Iyengar